Thank you for this! I've been thinking about this for a while as I feel myself caught between two mentors--one who loves personality assessments and the other who is very wary of them :) This speaks to both of their perspectives and offers a beautiful way of honoring both.
I've also been thinking about this a lot with regards to my son. I think that if he were evaluated, he might be diagnosed with autism. I grapple a lot with whether that would be helpful to him or not and how to engage him in the decision (he's 11).
I'll be bookmarking this one for future reference!
I love this Mike! Thank you for sharing from your own story. I wrote about a tangential that I call “the stick” - we all got them, and like you said, it’s not about having shame over them or denial over their negative side effects… but instead embracing both sides and keeping the stick in balance.
Yes! And absolutely... labels can help us think, "Maybe it's ok I'm this way." But, they can also limit how we see ourselves (not just what we do with it). For example, the various characteristics of HSP I experience may not be the same as Mike's. I think the primary advantage here is to be able to recognize that we are unique in all of time and valuable (after all, "There is value in all rarity," as Og Mandino reminds us). Perhaps a primary value of a label is to not feel so alone. But, really, you get to be you. In fact, please be you!
I hear you, I'm HSP as well. Any public setting has the potential to trigger anxiety, but I don't let that define me or stop me from enjoying life. I also know that after being triggered, I need some time to decompress.
Mike, great post. Before I even finished your opening story, I thought, "I wonder if this is how my husband feels and why he can get so thrown off by things that seem so inconsequential to me...!?" I've felt like it's a fixation (particularly towards the negative or what's 'not right').
He's an HSP, and this knowledge has helped him a lot. I'm excited to share this with him - great perspective for all of us to consider.
I am so delighted with what you have put into words in this authentic message that both challenges and inspires me! When my emotions are too big, I am quickly overwhelmed and need a way out. Your twist on not allowing our so-called weaknesses to define us, but rather to turn those very things into our strengths is revolutionary. This will require intentionality and practice. I am pleased and determined to go the next level. Commit to stop the negative cycle and replace it with positive truth! Thanks for sharing, Mike!
Excellent insight!
I share may of those HSP “super powers”, as well as those from ADD and a few others lables.
Thank you for that reminder that though my issues/needs/idiosyncrasies may not be my fault, they ARE my responsibility.
This reminds me of an analogy my former therapist once shared with me…
“You can continue to go through the world demanding soft carpet to protect your tender feet…
Or you can learn to put on your own slippers on.
One path increases conflict and keeps you a victim…
The other path creates autonomy and builds self efficacy.
Only one is a path to peace.”
<>< Kelly Harrington
Thank you for this! I've been thinking about this for a while as I feel myself caught between two mentors--one who loves personality assessments and the other who is very wary of them :) This speaks to both of their perspectives and offers a beautiful way of honoring both.
I've also been thinking about this a lot with regards to my son. I think that if he were evaluated, he might be diagnosed with autism. I grapple a lot with whether that would be helpful to him or not and how to engage him in the decision (he's 11).
I'll be bookmarking this one for future reference!
I love this Mike! Thank you for sharing from your own story. I wrote about a tangential that I call “the stick” - we all got them, and like you said, it’s not about having shame over them or denial over their negative side effects… but instead embracing both sides and keeping the stick in balance.
https://coaching.jtsternberg.com/blog/the-stick-that-stuck/
Thank you again, Mike, you’ve given me a lot to think and challenge myself on.
Yes! And absolutely... labels can help us think, "Maybe it's ok I'm this way." But, they can also limit how we see ourselves (not just what we do with it). For example, the various characteristics of HSP I experience may not be the same as Mike's. I think the primary advantage here is to be able to recognize that we are unique in all of time and valuable (after all, "There is value in all rarity," as Og Mandino reminds us). Perhaps a primary value of a label is to not feel so alone. But, really, you get to be you. In fact, please be you!
I hear you, I'm HSP as well. Any public setting has the potential to trigger anxiety, but I don't let that define me or stop me from enjoying life. I also know that after being triggered, I need some time to decompress.
This is an excellent insight about labels and I love the curiosity needed to celebrate and move passed getting stuck!
I found this to helpful and insightful! I appreciate how clearly you explained.
Very helpful!
Why was this not obvious in the first place? lol
Mike, great post. Before I even finished your opening story, I thought, "I wonder if this is how my husband feels and why he can get so thrown off by things that seem so inconsequential to me...!?" I've felt like it's a fixation (particularly towards the negative or what's 'not right').
He's an HSP, and this knowledge has helped him a lot. I'm excited to share this with him - great perspective for all of us to consider.
Thanks for being human.
I am so delighted with what you have put into words in this authentic message that both challenges and inspires me! When my emotions are too big, I am quickly overwhelmed and need a way out. Your twist on not allowing our so-called weaknesses to define us, but rather to turn those very things into our strengths is revolutionary. This will require intentionality and practice. I am pleased and determined to go the next level. Commit to stop the negative cycle and replace it with positive truth! Thanks for sharing, Mike!
i feel you. literally.
also, i initially ordered these for sleep for myself and kids, but they have them for more social environments too.
i’m a fan of them!
https://us.loopearplugs.com/products/engage
Yes! I have been thinking lately that I use my ADHD-adjacency as an excuse rather than an opportunity.