[Part 2] Healthy Adulting 101

Kid Logic: “My mind is my most powerful tool and can solve all my problems.”

Welcome back to the Primal Question Newsletter.

My name is Mike Foster. If you’re new around here, I’m an Executive Coach who works with all sorts of world changers, from Navy SEALs to reality stars to nonprofit founders to executives of billion-dollar companies.

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Last week, we talked about Healthy Adulting as it relates to your body.

Today, we’re diving into the next domain…

Healthy Adulting Your Overactive Mind

I start every coaching session the same way.

With every client, I do a quick check-in of the whole person: mind, heart, soul, and body. Many of my clients struggle to distinguish the heart, soul, and mind, so here’s a quick overview of the difference:

Heart: Your emotions and feelings. This is where you name what you’re actually experiencing emotionally—frustrated, sad, peaceful, grateful.

Soul: Your connection to the mysterious and the thing that is bigger than you. (God, a higher power, etc. I keep this vague because my clients have varying belief systems.)

Mind: Your thoughts, stories, and narratives. This is the chatter in your head, the ruminating thoughts you keep coming back to, the things you’re hooked on mentally.

We hit on this last week, but most of us live our entire lives in our heads, which is why I created this visual illustration.

Big Head, Little Body

I draw this picture for almost every client.

A massive, bulbous head—like a hot air balloon—sitting on top of this tiny, weak stick figure body. The head is so huge it’s about to tip the whole thing over. The body is so small it can barely hold the weight.

I sketch this out, hold it in front of them, and say, “That’s you. That’s how you’re living your life.”

They often laugh because it’s painfully true, and I laugh with them because I know I’m drawing myself too.

As a Primal Question #1 (Am I Safe?), I have an overactive mind. I’m always capturing information because I believe information will keep me safe. If I can know enough, think enough, plan enough, analyze enough—then I’ll be protected. My mind never stops. It’s always engaged, always churning, always trying to solve the next problem before it even arrives.

That’s where I’m hooked. That’s my drug of choice: overthinking and hypercontrol.

It’s rooted in Kid Logic…

Kid Logic: “My mind is my most powerful tool and can solve all my problems.”

Kid Logic says your mind has all the answers, that you can think your way through anything.

That if you just think hard enough and long enough, you’ll figure everything out. Read more books. Consume more content. Analyze every angle. Get a second perspective. Kid Logic says all of your thoughts are true and that your mind can predict the future if it has enough information.

So we feed the beast.

We are information machines.

We’re always reading, always scrolling, always learning, always thinking. We believe if we can gather enough information, run enough mental simulations, and think through every scenario, we’ll finally feel safe and in control.

But here’s what actually happens:

The more we think, the more anxious we become.

The overactive mind isn’t solving anything; it’s spiraling. It’s creating problems that don’t exist yet. You’re living in mental scenarios that haven’t happened and probably never will. Fighting imaginary battles.

Let me be really clear about something:

Your mind can’t predict the future.

I know it thinks it can. I know it’s constantly running scenarios, trying to prepare you for what’s coming. But your mind has no view into tomorrow. Zero. It’s just a pattern-recognition machine recycling the past and calling it prophecy.

So what’s the point of all this overthinking?

The fact is, it’s not keeping you safe. It’s keeping you scared. All that mental noise—the constant chatter, the endless analysis, the 3 AM spiral sessions—it’s not protecting you from anything. It’s only exhausting you.

That’s why we need to stop trying to fill our minds.

We need to learn how to create quiet minds.

I’m not talking about emptying your mind completely or some Buddhist meditation thing. I’m talking about turning down the volume on all that mental static so you can actually hear the rest of yourself trying to help you. Because here’s what kid logic doesn’t understand:

An overactive mind drowns out your other sources of wisdom.

When your mind is running at full capacity, it’s like trying to have a conversation in a nightclub. The music’s so loud you can’t hear the person right next to you. That person could be telling you exactly what you need to hear, but you’ll miss it completely.

Adult wisdom says: “Every part of me deserves a seat at the table.”

Your body has intelligence. Your heart has wisdom. Your soul knows things. But when your mind is dominating the conversation, these other parts can’t get a word in. They’re trying to tell you something important, but you can’t hear them over your own mental noise.

And the first voice you need to hear? Your gut.

Did you know you have a second brain?

There’s actual research on this. Your gut has about 500 million neurons—scientists literally call it “the second brain.” But here’s what makes it different from your mind: it doesn’t explain itself.

Your gut is binary. Yes or no. Good or bad.

That’s it. No elaborate arguments. No PowerPoint presentations. Just a clear signal. Meanwhile, your mind is up there writing dissertations about why you should or shouldn’t do something. Your mind might say, “This bitcoin investment is brilliant! Here are 47 reasons why I should put all my money into this!”

Your gut just says: “Nope. Something is off here.”

The problem is, we can’t hear our gut because all our energy is trapped in our head.

Remember that Big Head, Little Body drawing? You need to push that energy down. Get it out of your big, bulbous head and back into your body where it belongs. Then, and only then, will you be able to tune into the wisdom in your gut.

Here’s how I do this:

Every day after coaching calls, I go to the gym.

My work is entirely mental: strategic planning, coaching conversations, writing, speaking, and workshop facilitation. By 3 PM, my head feels so full it’s about to explode. So I go work out with a trainer who makes me do things that require zero thinking. It’s the only way I’ve found to push that energy from my head down into my body. To restore balance. To finally hear what my gut has been trying to tell me all day.

Bottom line: Kid Logic says your mind has all the answers, but healthy adults know there is wisdom to be found in all four parts of themselves.

Here’s Your Action Item:

First, catch yourself in Big Head, Little Body mode. Know when to “call it quits” on the brain game. If you’ve been turning over a problem in your mind for hours, recognize that there is wisdom to be found elsewhere and give it a break.

Second, get out of your head and back into your body. What forces you out of your head? Walking, lifting, dancing—whatever works. Turn off your mind, and push all of that big brain energy back into your body.

Third, check in with your gut. Don’t try to explain it. Just listen to it. What is your gut saying?

Your overactive mind isn’t the solution. It’s often the problem.

Get out of your head. Get into your body. Let your whole person guide you.

Warmly,

Mike Foster

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In October, I launched the first cohort of Primal Question PRO, a 4-week program to get certified in the Primal Question model. We filled it in less than 24 hours, and even more surprisingly, we filled HALF of the next cohort the following day.

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