1 Mindset Shift to Improve Every Area of Your Life
After coaching hundreds of people, there's one shared trait among those who stay stuck.
I've coached hundreds of people from all walks of life.
CEOs, stay-at-home parents, Grammy-winning artists, and everyone in between. Without fail, there's one common thread among those who experience the most growth. And there's one shared trait among those who stay stuck.
It all boils down to this:
Are you living as a renter or an owner?
Approaching life with a renter's mindset is like living in an apartment where you're always waiting for the landlord to fix things. The dishwasher breaks? Call the landlord. Want to paint the walls? Better ask permission first.
It's a life of waiting, depending, and feeling powerless.
Approaching life with an owner's mindset, on the other hand, is like owning your home.
If something breaks, you fix it. Want to paint the walls neon green? Go for it! It's your house, your rules. You're in charge. You’re responsible for both the upsides and the downsides.
The renter's mindset is fine when it comes to renting a home.
The problem is, many people live with a renter's mindset in every area of their lives.
They think they need to ask permission to change or believe somebody else is going to come along and solve their problems. Their default belief is that someone else needs to change for them to be okay. The government. Their spouse. Their boss.
It’s a powerless mindset.
Growth-minded people trade a renters mindset for an owners mindset.
This is your house. This is your life. You don't need permission from anybody to resign from your job and follow your dreams. The owner's mindset says, “I am responsible for me. This is my life. If I want to do something, I'm going to take all of the consequences, pros and cons, all of the upside, but also all the downside.”
There's a reason people embrace the renter's mindset.
It sounds amazing. Wouldn't it be great if there was someone who could read your mind, anticipate all of your needs, and show up on a moment's notice to solve all of your problems?
The problem is, it’s a complete fantasy.
No one is coming. This is a hard truth, but it's necessary. It feels defeating, but in reality, it's freeing. Once you realize that your life is your responsibility, you realize that it's in your power to make a change.
Adopt an ownership mindset.
Take charge of your life.
Make decisions, take action, and own the results – both good and bad. When you do this, you'll experience incredible benefits: increased confidence, greater resilience, and the ability to create the life you truly want. This mindset shift is powerful in every area of life, but I want to take it one step further.
There's one area where this shift can create massive, rapid change:
Owning Your Primal Question.
Your Primal Question is the driving force of your life.
It represents your apex emotional need and is the biggest influence on your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Here's the mistake most people make: they have a renter's mindset when it comes to their Primal Question.
They wait and wait for someone to come along and answer their question for them.
A Q1 waits for someone to make them feel safe. A Q2 waits for someone to make them feel secure. A Q3 waits for someone to make them feel loved. And so on, through all seven Primal Questions. They sit around and wait, hoping someone, someday will come along and fix their problems.
Their catchphrase is "if only..."
"If only my spouse would do this."
"If only I was more talented."
"If only someone would give me a chance."
The problem?
99% of people are ALSO living as renters. They're ALSO waiting for someone to come along and answer their primal questions, so they're way too focused on themselves to answer yours.
But when you embrace your Primal Truth and answer your question for yourself, guess what? Not only do you feel grounded and at peace, but you now get to give that to others.
Now that you are secure in your Primal Question, you can do for others what you wished someone would do for you. You can answer their Primal Question with a yes! You can give your Primal Gift.
As a Q1, you can help others feel safe. As a Q2, you can help others feel secure. As a Q3, you can help others feel loved.
And so on, for each Primal Question.
You're not the only one who pays a price when you live out of a renter's mindset. The world pays a price. But when you adopt an owner's mindset and give your primal gift away, everyone around you benefits.
Here's your challenge for this week:
Identify one area where you've been living with a renter's mindset, especially in relation to your Primal Question. Then, make one decision – big or small – where you take full ownership. No permission needed, no waiting for someone else. Just you, taking charge of your life.
Remember, you are the owner of your life story.
It's time to start writing it the way you want it to be read.
Warmly,
Mike Foster